I have arrived at the conclusion that as humans become ever more globally ‘connected’ in the digitally networked world, they are becoming alarmingly ‘disconnected’ and isolated on a personal level. While access to data has never been so immediately accessible, the quality of our conversations, the incisiveness of our problem solving, and our collective ability to focus on what really matters, and reach universal agreements on what actually needs to be done, are all in sharp decline.
Six years have passed since I wrote this piece. It was brought back to my attention this week by someone, and I decided I didn’t need to update a single word.
Many people are inclined to jump to action rather quickly. After all, isn’t this what people feel they are being paid for? To make decisions, to be decisive, to act !
Acting, in my experience, is rarely the biggest problem we face within our boardrooms, executive groups and operational teams. Our businesses and organisations are replete with people who plan, manage tasks, monitor activities, schedule, organise and control. I don’t sense that we need to build more skill in these areas.
The bigger challenges that face our business leaders are in the quality of conversations they undertake, their depth of problem analyses, and their ability to reach universal agreements on what actually needs to be done to bring about the major changes that will transform our businesses and organisations to turnaround…
“The average attention of a “millenial” is 8 seconds”.
Who said so? Well, a “millenial” of course! Not just any “millenial”. This attention-grabbing claim was made by an impressive young man who was a presenter at a conference I attended this week in London. Billed as a ‘disruptor’, (credit: Ilias Vartholomaios, Co-Founder of Owiwi) he spoke about the realities that those of us who identify with the 20th Century (I’m one) will have to come to terms with as we live out the remainder of our lives in the 21st.
Young people born after 1995 have not yet become part of the mainstream workforce. He informed us that, by the time they reach the age of 21 they will have spent (on average) 10,000 hours playing online games. As a comparator, that is pretty much the same amount of time an average US student will spend in high school between fifth grade and graduation, assuming a perfect attendance record.
I recently experienced my first Deep Democracy workshop as a participant and it was a real eye-opener. It is simple yet powerful, and has the potential to create real transformation, not just routine actions for improvement. It was born out of South Africa’s transformation from apartheid to democracy, and is used by leaders and facilitators from all walks of life. The process enables voices to be heard that are often left unheard, and mines the inherent wisdom hidden within the system by resolving tension and conflict. (see Deep Democracy).
The process invites people to step into different perspectives or roles, some of which they may not be in agreement with. The conversations that emerge from these different perspectives are illuminating. New information is surfaced, new possibilities emerge and collective wisdom that has been buried within the system is given an opportunity to reveal itself.
At a time when people all around the world are questioning what is real, what is true and what is fake news, the very meaning of democracy is under challenge. Who runs things? Is it the politicians? What is the role of the media? And what about the technology giants, such as Facebook, Google and Amazon? Where do we go to seek our answers and who can we rely on to reveal the truth about what is most important for us? Continue reading →
A recent discussion with a client about a business problem they were facing prompted me to dig out this blog post that I wrote back in 2012. It would appear that the problems organisations face as a result of people ‘avoiding’ difficult conversations is as rife as ever. I should not be surprised. People do not like giving or hearing difficult messages, and even those who know that to be true, often lack the skills required to overcome their natural instinct to ‘avoid’, ‘deflect’, ‘normalise’ and ‘tolerate’ the unacceptable. More work is needed in this vital area to raise capability.
Nancy Kline in her superb book Time to Think describes a conversation with a senior civil servant whose department was going through wave after wave of changes to the way work was done and how things were structured. When asked how his managers were coping with all of this, he responded, ‘I have no idea. I don’t ask them.’ When asked ‘Why?’, he said, ‘They might tell me. We couldn’t have that.’ As Nancy goes on to explain, what he was really saying was that “he couldn’t handle that”.
How common is it for managers to shy away from facing up to the reality of what is going on around them, particularly when it might involve a face-to-face conversation with someone? Very common, in my experience. Confronting bad news, delivering home truths, providing feedback on performance, addressing inappropriate behaviour, or challenging resistance to change. All…
“Don’t be stupid son. You come from Doncaster.” ~ Steve McDermott
Last month I published a post in the wake of the killings in Paris called Hands up if you’re scared. The thrust of the piece was about fear, and the natural (and adaptive) reactions we have to dangerous situations. It was also about the exploitation of that fear, by both terrorists and political hawks.
In addition to those external voices of doom, we also have to be on our guard against our own internal enemy. The voice from within plays into the hands of the arguments of external fear-mongers. Many people have studied and written about the many forms our internal voice takes. Sometimes we can think of it as our conscience, our guide, our fairy godmother, looking out for us and keeping us on the straight and narrow. Or it may manifest…
How can Choice be bad for us? This surely goes against everything that we in the western world have taken for granted for decades, indeed hundreds of years. Choice is fundamental to freedom, and, for people who have no freedom, it makes total sense that increasing personal choice, will provide at least an illusion of freedom, and in turn enhance their welfare, satisfaction and happiness.
You are a manager. You are responsible for getting the best from your team. You will be held to account if deliveries don’t happen, if deadlines are missed and if budgets overrun. But of course, you are a good manager and those things rarely happen. You know how to engage, motivate and inspire your people. Don’t you?
We’ve all had those conversations with people where you’ve had to lay out what’s on the line. Why it’s so important this time – again! And, on the whole, those cosy chats work. People walk away from those sessions, and they get on with it. They pull out all the stops and you can all go down the pub and enjoy a few drinks to celebrate the team’s (and your!) success once again.
But, what if it just doesn’t matter to them that much? What if they don’t care? Or, they just don’t care enough? What’s the right conversation to be having with that person now?
Multi-tasking or Distractedness? Selective Attention or Divided Attention? Where do you stand on information overload? Are you in control of what you attend to, or has how you think and what you think about been taken over by the internet and social media? Think about it…..!!!
Perhaps ‘the’ most tantalising allure of any advancement in engineering or technology through the ages has been the promise of saving us time. Cars, trains and planes certainly get us places faster than horses ever did. Bridges and tunnels allow us to take short-cuts over rivers and through mountains, saving us hours. Advances in IT and robotics mean that tasks previously handled manually have been automated with exponential levels of increased productivity.
Why, with so much technology and time-saving gadgetry at our fingertips, do people still present at coaching sessions with issues and concerns about their ability to manage their time? After all, our lives have never appeared to be more organised ~ or perhaps I should say digitised! More and more of us are hooked up to the Net from morning to night.
As a coach, I have never been one to feel wedded to a particular philosophy or specific model. There are too many rich and interesting ways of thinking out there, and to ignore them because they don’t fit with ‘your model’ seems short-sighted. Also, no two clients are ever the same, and what works best for one person may not hit the mark for another. As such, I believe that having a deep tool-bag of coaching techniques is essential. That way, and with experience of using them, you can start to get a sense of what will work best for different clients.
One area that I have recently borrowed from, and found hugely powerful in coaching practice, is that of ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy). ACT is based upon a model of psychological flexibility (called the ACT hexaflex). The principle being that healthy emotional functioning is achieved as a result of…
It is heartening to revisit old blog posts and find that they are still as relevant today as they were when they were first written. The Open golf championship is underway at Royal Birkdale this weekend, and, as always, Rory McIlroy is very much under the spotlight. He has come into the championship in rather patchy form, and after the first 9 holes on the first day he was virtually written off as a contender. He could not find his ‘A’ game and looked like he was as good as out of it. In the second half of the round he pulled himself together and put himself back in the frame. Afterwards he was interviewed and asked how far off playing at his best he felt he was. He has clearly learned much in the intervening years since the original post. He said that he felt it was ‘real close’ and ‘there was no reason he could not go out in the next few days and really put himself in a great position to be one of the main contenders for the championship’. We will wait and see how it unfolds, and watch with interest to see if Rory can find his ‘A’ game.
I was intrigued by something that Rory McIlroy said recently in an interview following his widely-reported ‘early exit’ from the Honda Golf Classic in Florida. Clearly he has been going through a troubled time, with speculation bouncing between whether it is down to his new clubs deal, his relationship with tennis star Caroline Wozniaki, or, as he claimed in Florida, a troublesome wisdom tooth.
He summed up how he feels when he is off his game in very simple terms. “I always think when I’m playing bad that it’s further away than it is.”(meaning his best game). I sense this is true for many of us, in all walks of life. Rory went on to say“….If I have a bad round, it’s sort of like the end of the world.” This ‘catastrophizing’ form of thinking, is, I am sure, familiar to many of us…